Fatigue: : the tendency of a material to break under repeated stress. (Merriam Webster)
Have you ever worked a piece of metal back and forth until it snapped? That is my best definition of fatigue. That is how I feel right now. I feel like the same actions are occurring over and over. If left to repeat it will take its toll. The funny thing is, I am not sure how.
Right now my relationship with my family is as strong as ever and my faith walk is solid. I have a resolve that is unwavering and my tenacity is ever present. So I am confused as to what this fatigue is about. Perhaps I have been in the waiting place too long. This in between world I am in, where nothing is finite. I don't know, but I am feeling the strain. Perhaps it is a good fatigue. Is there such a thing?
I don't know if you have ever noticed or bothered to understand, but the name of my blog is "Soliloquy's echo". A soliloquy is the internal monologue of one's self. The echo is what you get to read. I love to share of myself and let you really know what is going on inside of me. Hence the name. Just thought I would share.
Is there a good fatigue? Yes. But I believe that it usually comes from something that is satisfying and worthwhile... so if you are not feeling that, perhaps it is not a good fatigue.
ReplyDeleteI am a question poser... so here goes...
What are you missing? What is lacking in your life that perhaps you need to seek, go after? Are you in a 'holding pattern' because there is something you need to let go of and therefore move on?
Why are you staying in your 'in between' world? Is it safe, even though it is placing strain on you?
Just some thoughts.
My pastor describes this time in my life as the "waiting place". He says that God is doing work in me and I can't rush what is going on. I agree with him and believe I am right where I need to be. I have concluded that my timing is not His timing, and I couldn't be happier.
ReplyDeleteSo, am I missing something? Yes! But it isn't up to me to decide when I get it. But I trust in the one who will give it.